Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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