My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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