Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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