idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
