I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
this beer tastes like vomit already
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
