just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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