She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
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