she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Randomize
