so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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