I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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