Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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