dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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