Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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