I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Randomize
