kristin has been a bad kristin
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
