how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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