She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize
