I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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