can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Randomize