I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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