What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
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