Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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