Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
