Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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