She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
