the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
