Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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