do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
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