I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize