How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
