spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
