just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Randomize
