You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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