Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
