What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
