Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
