speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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