she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
