I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
