CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
