You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
