Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Randomize
