I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize