She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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