Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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