Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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