Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
