there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Randomize
