he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Randomize
