And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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